Reaction to Levi Johnston’s ‘Today’ Show Appearance

PERSONALS:

Male satirist, mid-40s, behind in rent, enjoys old movies, sports, and free publicity, seeks post-statutory daughter of prominent and/or polarizing politician willing to commit to relationship through next national election.  Contact: TheDesperateBlogger.com

PETA Launches Fly Adoption Program

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), the often-controversial animal rights group, today announced the launch of “Operation Sol,” its latest worldwide effort to promote fly adoption as well as public education and awareness of ongoing threats to flies everywhere.

Still riding the wave of popularity brought about by the organization’s uncharacteristically muted reaction to President Obama’s savage killing of an innocent White House fly, PETA President Ingrid Newkirk today expressed confidence that this initiative — named for Sol Madison, the beloved late pet fly of New York Herald sportswriter Oscar Madison — “… will lead to greater understanding of, and tolerance for, annoying little shit-eaters of many species.”

Due to the vast number of homeless and endangered flies, as well as their staggering rate of reproduction, Ms. Newkirk cited ‘Op-Sol’s’ urgent need for a consistent food supply. Donations of fly food can be mailed (or shipped) to the address found by clicking the “Donate Now” link at peta.org (It is requested that ‘flymeal’ of human origin be limited to vegetarian sources only.) Contributors are also urged to give donations directly to PETA members in their community, who, as Ms. Newkirk noted, are generally easy to find.

Editor’s Note: The Desperate Blogger urges its reader(s) to support Operation Sol. Whenever you see someone throwing red paint on unsuspecting passers-by wearing fur or leather, please give them as much shit as you possibly can.

Organizers Needed for ‘Hanni-Tea Parties’

Must Understand Difference Between ‘Protesting’ and ‘Tea-Bagging’

A ‘Please-Steal-This-Idea’ Call to Action from TheDesperateBlogger.com

To Anyone Tiring of FOX-News:

1. Claiming to be “Fair and Balanced”
2. Promoting events supporting their agenda instead of merely reporting on them
3. Involving themselves in the political process instead of merely reporting on it
4. Representing GOP materials as their own research (http://mediamatters.org/items/200902100019)
5. Lying to support “fair and balanced” claim (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/04/13/foxs-cavuto-claims-networ_n_186156.html)
6. Representing themselves as ‘patriotic’ under Republican administration, then advocating violent overthrow of Obama administration (a.k.a. ‘treason’) (http://forums.hannity.com/showthread.php?t=1326121)

The time has come for a response they can understand! (i.e. numbers, not words)

While ‘Tea-Bagging’ is still against the law in many places, exercising freedom of speech in a good old-fashioned protest is not. And since the ‘Un-Silent Minority’ doesn’t seem to understand what any of these terms actually means, it is incumbent upon their fellow citizens to teach them – well at least the ‘freedom of speech’ and ‘good old-fashioned protest’ parts.

I encourage anyone reading this to take it and run with it. (ADHD has rendered me a disorganized mess…)

This country is in desperate need of Anti-FOX-News/Pro-Obama Agenda ‘Hanni-Tea Parties’ with turnouts that overwhelm the attendance numbers of the Fox-promoted Tea-Bagging sideshows.

They may not understand the Constitution, but they understand numbers. It is time they be shown that blatant hypocrisy and total disregard for integrity have no place in the ‘News’ business.

Government Should Put Onus on AIG Bonus Execs

Editorial

I doubt I’ll offend too many by comparing AIG financial services executives expecting to cash huge bonus checks at taxpayers’ expense to racketeers. While it’s probable that the law is on their side, when it comes to scruples I can’t think of a better analogy. So after hearing a week of posturing by politicians and pontificating by talking heads (and politicians) I can no longer resist the urge to put in my two cents’ (or is it billions’) worth.

The one thing everyone seems to agree on is that the wolves in designer clothing closely examined the rules and then figured out the best way to exploit the game. Add to that the fact that the government, ostensibly due to legal concerns, conveniently provided the same players with a loophole large enough to drive a Brinks truck through and we find ourselves in the midst of a $165 million scandal that has consumed the public consciousness to the point that two wars, the rest of the global economic meltdown, and the wacko with eight newborns have all but faded from view.

Fine. But now how do we deal with these bastards?

The answer is actually quite simple, and ironically, it’s something that property/casualty insurance companies (though not necessarily AIG) have been doing for years to avoid paying off on losing bets. Exploit the system.

Thanks to tight regulatory controls, whole life insurance has long been and remains one of the great financial safe havens. And let’s face it, dead is dead — there’s not a lot of gray area for lawyers to argue over. Other contracts, however, usually provide room for debate. Just ask any of the Hurricane Katrina victims whose insurance carriers denied their claims arguing that damage caused by the storm surge was ‘flood damage’ (not covered) as opposed to ‘windstorm damage’ (covered) to avoid paying an unprecedented and potentially devastating number of claims. It was a calculated gamble. Any actuary (most of whom are employed by insurance companies) will tell you that only a certain percentage of claimants will have the will or the means to fight for their rights in court.

This is where the racketeer analogy can and should be exploited. There is only one thing that most racketeers value more than money, and that’s anonymity. The fact that only three names of AIG bonus recipients have been made public shows us that the racketeer mindset exists. The piranhas fear becoming pariahs. So why not tell them that their claim to the bonus money is invalid and if they want to collect, they’ll have to sue? They’ll have to emerge from the comfort of the shadows, expose themselves to light of day, and explain to a judge and jury, on the public record, why they deserve to collect. Let’s face it, anyone who’s gotten to the to the level of seven figure bonuses has probably already made quite a bit of money and has the means to sue. But how many of these anonymous shadow dwellers have the will?

And for those who do, assuming the law is on their side and it winds up costing the taxpayers just as much or maybe even a little bit more than the current $165 million, at least we’ve sent a loud and clear message that the old game is over, the rules are changing, and the culture must change with them.

At least that would be an investment, not a handout.